that crazy cancer girl

My journey through cervical cancer

Where are you?

on December 9, 2013



Where has the time gone?!? I haven’t blogged in 4 days. Tis the busy season of the year with baking and parties and shopping and so much more. Sometimes we need to find that quiet moment to reflect on the true reason for the season. Today I am doing just that. I have a lot of things going on in this head of mine that needs to be straightened out.

A few weeks before I was diagnosed our dear pastor was diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer. They did surgery, but it was to far advanced. This past Friday he went to be with Jesus. I remember walking into my Dr appointment one day and passed one of the rooms and there he sat with his wife and one of their 5 daughters and his grand daughter. I backed up and said Hi Pastor Chuck. He grinned that big grin of his and we chatted for a few minutes and through all of what he was going through, he looked at me and said we are praying for you. I had to excuse myself to get to my appointment and also because I knew if I didn’t get out of their I was going to end up crying over those few words.

We went to his memorial service yesterday and the amount of people that he had an impact on was amazing. The church was packed and then chairs had to be set up in the foyer and social hall. The service was beautiful and I honestly have to say it made me think. I hope it makes you think too…

I know without a doubt if I were to die right now where I would be going. I know that I would see my sweet Mother and my sister and grandparents that have went on before me, I thought what kind of impact have I had on people. What words would be said about me at my service? What could I have done differently in my life to have helped more people come to know God? So many questions that cross my mind when I go to funerals.

I don’t want to be a run of the mill Christian, I don’t want to be a person who thinks if I do good I’m going to Heaven. I don’t want to be a follower. We tell our kids to be a rebel for God. So many kids out there think they are rebels because they don’t listen to authority and they go against the grain. Well we don’t want our kids to listen to others that try to get them to do bad, we want them to be leaders and not followers and to go against the grain, ruffle some feathers and get people thinking. I want to be a rebel and ruffle some feathers. The world is trying to get rid of Christianity, but I want to stand up for my faith and what I believe in. Even in public as a family we hold hands and bow our heads to pray at the table. People sometimes come up to us and say that is so good to see and others have not been so nice. I don’t care because when I pass I want to leave a legacy for our kids to follow just like the one my beautiful Mother left us.

I am reminded daily that I have cancer. God can either heal me or He can take me. I prefer to stick around for a long time to be with my family, but should He choose to take me then I know I am ready, but have I made a big enough impact on those who know me…

How about you? Should the good Lord decide to take you today do you know where you are going? Have you made an impact on others? If not then this Christmas season is the best time of year to make that decision! Jesus came to earth as a baby only to live and die for you.  Think about that today and if you have questions don’t hesitate to email me and I will answer them to the best of my ability!

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have aver lasting life.


One response to “Where are you?

  1. Heather says:

    This is chuck’s youngest daughter. I just wanted to mention that I came across your blog and this post meant a lot to me. I am thinking and praying for you and your family during such a difficult time.

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