that crazy cancer girl

My journey through cervical cancer

A Mother’s day without a Mother…

on May 8, 2014

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Her hair, was a beautiful wavy dark brown and her eyes had many smiley wrinkles around them.

Her lips always perched with a smile.

Her hugs gentle, but strong.

Her words always caring whether you were in trouble or not.

Her prayers breathtaking and beautiful.

Her voice just like a birds, it grew more of the music, and less of the words

“Her” is my Mom. Mother’s day is always the hardest. How do I celebrate me being a Mom if I don’t have a Mom to celebrate anymore. We sit on the right side of the church right beside a beautiful stained glass window. One Sunday morning as I was sitting there (supposed to be listening to the sermon) I was looking around and there on the bottom of the window a verse. It stood out like fluorescent bold letters to me and I could not take my eyes off of it. Her children rise up and call her blessed… Wow… I realized that I was going all wrong with this. I needed to celebrate my Mom’s life. She was truly blessed with so much.

Am I allowed to be sad? Absolutely Am I allowed to wish she was still here? Absolutely Am I allowed to get angry? It depends. At God? No At the thought that I can’t celebrate without her? Yes Not only was my Mom an inspiration in my life, but the lives of many others. My friends, my kids, my husband and so many more. Mother’s day is about her and so many other Mom’s out there that may or may not be with us. On Sunday I will be celebrating my Mom because without her I would not be here. I would not be the Mother that I am today. Abraham Lincoln said it best when he said, “All I am, or can be, I owe to my angel mother.”

I wrote this poem on the first Mothers day after Mom passed. I revise it every year because the feelings never change…

“Mother’s Day Without Mom”

It’s been six years now Since you left us all alone,                                                                                                                                                                                                   Your with your family and friends Up in your Heavenly home,

Not a day goes by That I don’t think of you,                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Missing your very presence next to me                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Trying so hard not to feel blue

Life has been so different                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Many things have changed,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Picking up the phone and not hearing your voice                                                                                                                                                                                                    Has felt so different and strange

Mother’s Day is coming                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  The sixth one without you,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Though I can’t send you flowers                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  You will be in my heart, this is true

I miss you so much Mom It tears me up inside,                                                                                                                                                                                             Although your in a better place now Where someday we both will reside

So “Happy Mother’s Day” Mom Although I can’t be with you,                                                                                                                                                                                  Your missed by all of us I hope you can read this and know it’s very true

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2 responses to “A Mother’s day without a Mother…

  1. Sharon Albright says:

    Oh I miss your dear precious Mother. My Friend she will always be. What a lovely, sweet picture. I think of her and miss her. What a glorious reunion one of these days! Happy Mother’s Day to you! Love you and pray for you.

  2. Sandra Hess Greenfield says:

    Dru was a precious woman and a wonderful mother, I know how hard Mothers Day can be without your mother, I miss mine each and every day. Hope you have a wonderful Mothers Day, enjoy your children and your wonderful memories.

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